Changing Signs
For me, personally, signs with movable letters have always been a tempting treat. I see these signs as a practical joker's word game, similar to Scrabble. You have a set amount of letters and you must turn them into something funny. However, to get a chance to pull off this joke you have to either be in the right place at the right time or be willing to take a little risk.
You may happen upon a sign where there are no potential witnesses around to see you do the dirty deed. For instance, when I was in high school a friend and I were in the cafeteria after school and luckily no one else was around. The standing lunch menu sign for prepackaged foods whose items and prices rarely changed, immediately drew our attention. What an opportunity. We made a few slight changes, so as to not call the attention of the lunch lady, but enough so that other students would have a chance to see our handy work the next day. We rearranged one of the items to read, "Hot Semen Sandwich - $2.75" and another to proudly display "Cold Dead Rat - $.25." To this day, when I see a similar lunch sign I can't help but laugh.
As another example of being in the right place at the right time, I recently had an opportunity to change a sign at my chiropractors office. I was in the waiting area, there were no other patients around, and the assistant's view was blocked from their small office sign. I rearranged some of the letters to make the sign to read:
Dr. Jack L. Black
Backs Broken Here
I didn't change the doctor's name I just wanted patients to wonder and think to themselves "what the hell is going on here?" I would love to have seen the doctors or office assistant's face when they finally noticed the changed sign.
Other times you may have to sneak around or go under the cover of darkness to change a sign. I must recommend that you not try these if you are over 18 and do not want the possibility of seeing any jail time. My friends and I once changed a hair salon's sign that boasted a "Perm Sale" and some other information to:
WALK INS WELCOME
SPERM SALE
$39.95
WITHDRAWN
That same night we found a road sign near a lake advertising the Tri Lake Lions Club Christmas tree and wreath sale. We modified the sign to read:
TRI LAKE TITTY CLUB
BIG TITS
ON DISPLAY
We had to make sure that we hid from passing cars and avoided the law to pull off these sign changes. I remember having had an adrenaline rush when we saw a cop car go driving by on the highway. Even though it was a little risky, I think it was well worth it.
My classmates in school made an even better sign change later that year. Someone late at night changed a large sign outside the high school that was usually reserved for current announcements, to read:
WES GERMEN EATS ASS
$5 - O.B.O
The sign was changed by some of Wes's friends. In case you are wondering, the O.B.O. stands for "or best offer" and Wes never ate anyone's ass. The sign was changed later that day but students recalled it fondly for years to come.
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